Never has this cover photo been more appropriate.
Two of the most insane things happened in Texas over the last few days. I thought about focusing on just one but it would be a crime to leave out the other. So we’ll talk about both.
Both of these statements are 100% true.
The University of Texas football team’s special teams coach Jeff Banks’ girlfriend’s (a stripper named Pole Assassin who he left his wife for) monkey bit a child who was visiting their backyard haunted house.
A large group of QAnon believers gathered at Dealey Plaza in Dallas in the rain yesterday in hopes of seeing John F Kennedy Jr. emerge to announce that he would be Donald Trump’s vice presidential running mate in the 2024 election. JFK Jr. died in a plane crash in 1999.
While I take immense pleasure in reporting both of those things I want to reiterate: I did not make either of those things up. Here are the Good, Bad, Funny, and so, so Dumb things from these events.
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